A Word About Astronauts

Last night I had the pleasure of seeing Col. Chris Hadfield (ret.) speak at a book launch. I have to say, I came away with a few strange feelings.

He talked about his childhood dream of becoming an astronaut after watching footage of men walking on the moon. He has spent his whole life pursuing his dream and at the age of 32, 23 years after he saw Neil Armstrong take that first step, he accomplished his dream and became an astronaut.   

That both inspires and terrifies me. My dreams aren't as lofty or as robust: I understand that people have different things they want to accomplish within their lifetime and I am certainly not comparing myself to him in that regard. What struck me though, what really hit home and resonated within me, was one particular thing he said during the interview:

'We have all been given a very precious gift; the gift of life. If you don't follow your dreams and make them happen, you do a great disservice to those who would help you achieve your goals.'   

That gave me pause. I never thought about it like that. Now, I recognize that writing and walking in space are two very different things, but at the same time, they really aren't. His dream was to walk in space; mine is to write. I have started to accomplish that goal, albeit in tiny steps, and being able to quit my job and write full time is something that I am working towards. 

In other words, the spaceman gave me a thumb's up regarding my life choices. 

Oh Boy!

A lot has happened in the past little while. The biggest thing is going to happen in about 45 minutes when I meet with a couple of gamers who have built their own gaming system. They want me to write the accompanying gaming books that go along with it. I will be writing  characters, developing back stories, and coming up with story lines to be later developed into modules for the system. AND I will be involved with game-testing.

Wow. I can't even describe this.

But wait, there's more. A prominent pop-culture website just asked me to write for them as well, and while I can't say who yet, I can tell you that it's super-cool. Add to that the fact that I am also developing content and stories for a local comic book publisher and I am all of a sudden really busy with some amazing new projects.

My day job is going down the tubes as there is nothing challenging about chaotic days. My days are so busy with ridiculous work that include duplicated tasks, mostly because of lack of follow-through from co-workers. I am stressed out every time I walk through the door and it's great to know that soon I will be able to work on something other than this.

I am happy and excited. So good to be doing something other than PR.

Stop the World Please, I'd Like to Get Off

I am exhausted. This is apparently our 'slow time' and honestly, I am barely keeping it together.

Last week started with one of our senior people resigning. This week is looking like we are going to lose more people; my boss has 'chats' scheduled and I have no idea what that means.

I am confident in my position and know that my work is exemplary; I have no fear of being told I am no longer needed. I am doing my best to keep everyone positive and level-headed and to be honest, I am not sure that that is part of my job.

I have always sought to make sure that things are calm and that people are happy. Lately though, there has been a cloud over the office that I cannot get rid of despite my best intentions. 

In the end things will either get better or not with the senior person leaving. Perhaps with less stress in the office, we can all go back to doing our jobs. I know I'd like that. I am not a fan of drama, especially when it can be avoided.

I am also going to start drinking at work. That should be a thing.

Confusion is Not Good, But it Can be Helpful

I spend a lot of my time wandering around trying to figure things out. Part of this is due to my stubborn streak: I would much rather work through a problem on my own than ask for input. Last thing I need is another viewpoint getting all up in my grill and ruining my thought process.

I am learning that sometimes it's okay to hear another side. Sometimes another voice brings clarity and focus where there was only chaos and other times it adds to the confusion. Having said that, the times where things become clearer are not necessarily better: I can remember being told that my method of performing a task was sorely lacking and was provided with examples of how I could do it better. Even more to the point, I was given the name and number of an ex who had performed the act 'exquisitely' and was told that I could get some pointers. Crystal-fucking-clear. 

I appreciate when people try and help by sharing their experiences but understand that I will most likely not listen. #truth

I don't prefer to live in chaos; I prefer a more controlled existence with the occasional upset accompanied by tears and/or make up sex.

Look, it's Monday and I am tired and I am doing my best to be witty and write something clever. It isn't happening so I am going to go and day-drink.

You heard me.

Torn

Superman has always troubled me. It's not that I don't like him; I understand why his character is important to the Justice League and I get why his story is attractive. We've all had instances where we've wanted to find out that the people we live with weren't our real family and that we were placed with them in order to protect us until we were old enough to do whatever it is our real family thinks we should.

That was a really long sentence. 

What I struggle with  in this particular case is the sense of wrongness of the character. He's too strong. Like when Kyle Rayner  became Ion and took care of universe- and galaxy-wide conflict and injustice merely by thinking about it and the rest of the heroes sat back and twiddled their thumbs. Too much power in one character is, to me, boring. 

If I feel this way, then why did I like the movie so damn much? I'll tell you.

The 'Man of Steel' movie didn't delve into the whole 'falling from the stars' crap. It immediately went into the present and used flashbacks to show the audience the types of things young Clark dealt with growing up. It focused on him being taught the basics of human behaviour while ensuring his safety until the world was ready for him.

Yes, he slipped a few times. Yes, people thought he was a little strange. But he managed to hold all of that in until he was ready to face who he was. Watching his first foray into flight was both touching and a little sad. It was then that you could see he would always be alone, that there was no one who could ever come close to doing what he can do.

That kind of character breeds resentment and loneliness, which is why they introduce Lois into his life as a partner. She is the one who can help him figure out the rest of his destiny. Although she doesn't have any superpowers, she is fierce and dedicated to truth, which is not unlike other members of the Justice League. As an award-winning reporter she puts herself in harm's way in order to find out the real story so that she can bring it to the rest of the world.

I still don't like Superman very much but I will say this: I enjoyed the movie more than I thought I would. I am not rushing out to buy Superman comics, but I am interested to see if they progress his character in future films.

I Am So Tired

I have an extremely glamorous job. One of the things I am responsible for is making sure people don't freak out when shit hits the fan.

Today the shit hit the fan. It  hit so hard and with so much force, it was epic. 

I have an event tomorrow night that has been the bane of my existence. The planning involves equipment being shipped from all over the world, coordinating people on stationary bikes, LED lights, a giant hamster wheel, and lots of things I am not remembering. There are alcohol sponsors, dry-ice seared food, and a world-famous DJ. It's going to be absolutely fantastic.

Weather report calls for rain all day tomorrow. Torrential rain.

Did I mention that the party takes place on the top of a parking garage?

Fuck.

I just found out that the elevator in the parking lot is not working and with the elevator contractors on strike, we currently have no way to get all the equipment and food supplies to the top of the roof for the rain-party.

Double-fuck.

There is more bullshit but to be honest, I can't even get into it. I am sitting here typing this and listening to people in my office lose their shit as other things fall apart.

Time to go to work and patch this shit up.

Peace. 

I am Having a Moment

I met Sigourney Weaver.

You heard me.

Met her, talked with her, had my picture taken with her.

Wow.

That's all I can say right now.