Frustration: More than Just a Party Game

I am so frustrated with people. I realize that we all have to share the planet but jeezus. All I ask is that you make an effort to listen to me. That's all. Make the damn effort. Don't just pick out what you want to hear and ignore the rest because you are missing more than half of what I'm trying to say. That's when Frustration rears it's pointy head and tries to coerce Anger into joining it for high tea. Luckily, I managed to dissuade Anger from hanging around too long but she still got in a few good words.

I have a very stressful job and the last thing I want/need is the same situation in my personal life. I have various friends who only call me up when they need something and a few that don't call at all unless they are drunk and need to vent. I have my core group of people that treat me the way I ought to be, and the rest can go to hell. I do not need to fix everything in everybody's life just because I happen to be good at it. What I need is to fix my own life first and then possibly give others a hand.

I am tired of having to walk on eggshells because the people around me are sensitive. I am tired of having to explain that I am joking. I am tired of feeling guilty when I want to yell, and I am tired of being the grownup. What happened to these being my Carlsberg years? What happened to me finishing my book? It seems that as soon as I try and do something that might just possibly be good for me, people try to hold me back. Whether it's in the form of a crisis or someone just being good old fashioned upset with me for whatever reason, it just seems to me that I cannot get anything done. And that needs to change.

I realize that this world is filled to the brim with imperfection and irregularity. I also know that not everyone is like me and can't always understand me and what I need. I have tried my best to tell those around me what it is I need and no one seems to hear me. I guess the next step is to just do what I need to and shut everyone out while I do it and deal with the fallout later.