31 Dec 2014

This is the Way the World Ends...

I am seeing a lot of posts from people declaring that they will no longer take any shit from people and that they will cut people from their lives who "don't deserve to be in them". I understand the intensity of needing/wanting to keep shitty people away from you, but I wonder how much of it could have been avoided by a few people if they had changed what they were projecting.

When people treat you poorly, they are doing so because in a very subtle way, you have allowed them to. You have subconsciously given them the perception that since you don't treat yourself in a loving way, whatever that looks like, you don't expect others to treat you in a loving or respectful way. I am not in any way saying that those being treated poorly deserve it. No one deserves to be treated badly by anyone at any time. Part of your individual responsibility though, is ensuring that whatever you project outwards is truthful and loving because others who pick up on it will respond appropriately. If they don't, you can either walk away or try to change their perception of you.

Simply put: you reap what you sow. Don't be a shitty person, and people won't be shitty to you. It's that easy. Yes, there will be people to tell you that some people are just naturally shitty and that is true. Walk away from them, and go find your tribe. Those people are out there waiting for you.

Personally, I have an awesome group of people around me who are incredibly supportive of the path I have chosen to take. I have been able to reconnect with a few people from my past and together we have learned that not all things are as they once appeared to be. I have discovered lies within truths, and truth within lies. I have been betrayed by those who claimed to 'have my back' and have had people stand by me who don't know my middle name.

Time means nothing. Age means nothing. Personal truth is everything. When you discover what your own personal truth is and you begin to live by it, things are easier to overcome and people are easier to decipher.

I have spent a lot of time thinking about things I might have done differently in the past couple of years and I still come back to one simple truth: a lot of the bullshit could have been avoided if a conversation had taken place. Recognizing that some people are not able to have that conversation until a later time is difficult to accept, but necessary. Relying on others for your own peace of mind is never an option, and in choosing to move on without them, I feel relief and have let go of the need for closure. Sometimes, it just isn't necessary.

And so, as the last hours of 2014 are ticking away and the new year is opening up before us, I am grateful for many things this year. My book will be coming out next year, I reconnected with a couple of people whose absence had left a hole in my life that is now healed, and I learned many things about people that are both in my life and not. I  learned to concentrate more on the people who are in my life, as those who are not can quite simply go fuck themselves. Life is too short to waste it on shitty people, and I am happy that I have none in my life anymore.

Happy New Year. I hope you find your tribe.



8 Dec 2014

Stuff that's on my mind

You know when you work too much and feel like crap? That's where I am right now. I finished writing another book last month (in and around NaNoWriMo which was totally for me and completely worth the stress now that it's done) and now that it's in the editing phase, I'm kind of at a loss of what to do.

I have a few other projects on the go that I suppose I could apply more time to but I am fucking tired. My brain feels like there have been too many people traipsing around inside it for far too long and now that they're all gone, the silence is terrifying.

I always feel as though I need to be doing something. I know I've got another 40 - 50 years left on this hunk of dirt and I want to make it worthwhile but how exactly do you do that? It seems as though things like that aren't really up to you to decide; it's up to those who come after you to say whether you did neat-o stuff or not. 

Not that it matters. I mean, if it doesn't matter to you now, why would matter then? I've never been one to look to the crowd for acceptance and I don't imagine I'll start any time soon. It's far too much fun being unexpected.

Hedgehog with raspberry
Look at this hedgehog, for instance. Do you think he gives a shit about whoever is holding the camera? Doesn't look like it to me. He is far too wrapped up in his raspberry to care about what anyone else is thinking. 

Be like the hedgehog. Ignore the camera. Eat the berry. Savour every last morsel of that berry and when you're done, go find another one and do the exact same thing all over again.

All the time ignoring the camera and whoever is behind it. Those people don't understand why you are ignoring them and will keep watching to see if you make a mistake. You won't. You're eating a raspberry and enjoying it.

Life is truly too short to not eat the berries.

18 Nov 2014

Why Am I Angry?

It's no secret that I am a very angry person. I have a quick temper and low tolerance for racism, sexism, ageism, or any other type of pigeon-holing or shaming that goes on in the media. I find it infuriating that Kim Kardashian's ass gets more publicity than the fact we landed on a fucking comet, or that Alyssa Milano's photo of her breastfeeding her child is deemed to be 'socially inappropriate' when again, Kimmy-cakes is nude and photo-shopped to shit.

Sigh. There I go again.

Look, it isn't that I enjoy being angry or that I go out of my way to find things to be angry about. Seriously. All I have to do is check out social media: there is tons on there to be angry about, and most of it is completely ridiculous. So why bother getting upset?

I'll tell you why.

Just because you have an opinion on something does not entitle you to ridicule anyone who opposes it. Your opinion is just that: something that you developed for yourself. The fact that some people disagree with you does not mean that you are being targeted, or discriminated against, or anything like that. It means that someone doesn't share your viewpoint. 

Consider this: there are two possibilities for why an inordinate amount of people might disagree with you on a regular basis. You might actually be wrong and need to reexamine your opinions, or you could just be an asshole.

Some people would rather be an asshole than admit they're wrong. I get it, admitting you were wrong is tough to do. I have had my share of struggles with this and still find it hard at times to admit that I was wrong. But here's the point: I do admit it. I own up to the fact that maybe I didn't have all the facts or just made a mistake. 

At this point of my life, I don't have time for bullshit. I have zero time to waste on people who cannot have a conversation without trying to convert me, who judge me on my appearance, or who say I'm a 'fake nerd' because I don't watch Doctor Who. Instead, I choose to surround myself with loving, caring people who challenge me and support me because that is what I deserve. I deserve to lead a happy, fulfilling life with people I love who love me back not because of what I can do for them, but because of who I am.

And I don't care if you don't agree with me.











11 Nov 2014

Whole in One

I'd written this very moving piece about a few different things when it hit me. None of it matters. What matters is that my heart is beating, my lungs are expanding, and my mind is open. 

With those things, I can conquer the world.


14 Oct 2014

Sometimes, You Just Need a Break

I have been taking a bit of a break to figure out a few things. I always thought I was lazy because I am not able to get up early on a consistent basis. I would read articles about how other people set alarms in order to get some writing in prior to the start of their working day. I tried so hard to be one of those people, I really did.

But guess what happened?

Every time I set my alarm, intent on getting up in order to write or practice yoga I would hit the snooze button until it was too late. I would get up, get ready for work, and feel bad about myself because I felt I had failed.

What was actually happening was that my body was telling me that I am not a morning person and that I need my sleep. I will need to find another way to incorporate writing and yoga into my life.

So that's where I am right now. I am attempting to decipher the riddle that is time management. Funny how I can do this without trying at work but am stumped when trying to apply it to my personal life.

21 Aug 2014

Forgiveness is not a dirty word

At least, it isn't anymore.

I have struggled with forgiveness for the majority of my life. I equated forgiveness with weakness, something my father instilled in me at a very early age. He maintained that if you forgave someone, you were giving in and showing that person that you could be walked over.

As a result of that belief, I let a number of relationships either slip away or burn to a fiery crisp. Anger, hate, pain, and suffering were the results of not seeing past the error and offering forgiveness. I wanted to, but my fear of rejection and my father's words were both too strong and I wasn't able to do it.

I decided I didn't want to do that anymore and set out on a personal journey to find a way to forgive those who have hurt me. I also wanted to find a way to forgive myself for the plethora of mistakes I have made due to my lack of openness.

I worked through one of the most difficult times of my life using only a pen and some lined paper. I wrote down my feelings, thoughts associated with each event, and addressed those involved personally. I made it clear what/who had hurt me, what I was sorry for, and detailed how I might have handled things had I been more open. I poured my heart out through writing, trying to excise the deep-seated anger and resentment I had been feeling up to that point.

To say it worked would be an understatement. I saw an old photo with some of the people I had 'written to' and all I felt was a deep sense of peace. No pangs of envy, no stirrings of anger, just quiet and calm. I cannot tell you how amazing that felt; to be able to gaze at people who used to be the centre of my world and only feel the utmost peace.

Do I have regrets? You bet I do. Am I in any kind of position to change any of it? Nope, and to be honest I don't think I would if I had the chance. I needed to go through all that to see how powerful it is when you forgive absolutely. 

Besides, even Batman forgave someone. Once.
 

11 Aug 2014

On Being Everywhere

I get it. After all these years, I finally understand it. I think I always knew it deep down and just needed to let myself actually believe it.

I do believe it. Balls deep, in fact.

I cannot be everything to everyone and I cannot be everywhere for everyone. I sometimes have to decline invitations to do things with friends and when they are upset with me because of it, that's okay. I have to listen to myself and do what's right for me at that time. If that means I don't go see that movie/band/whatever, then fine.

At first, I was scared to tell people that I needed time on my own rather than join them for their outing. I thought they`d make some sort of mean jab (and some did but I no longer have them in my life), and when they didn`t, I realized something very powerful: personal truth.

It`s very difficult to be truthful about your own feelings when you feel you are obligated to people. Speaking your truth when you need to is very empowering and tells the other person that you are practicing self-love. Taking care of yourself first is not selfish: it`s a necessity. How the fuck can you take care of others if you aren`t taking care of yourself? 

Seriously. Take a few minutes and think about who you are and what you need. At this moment, it might be a cup of coffee. That's a good start. While sipping your coffee, think about what else you might need and then do that. One step at a time.

Baby steps = laying the foundation to practise self-love every day. 

29 Jul 2014

What Happens if you Just Draw Another Card?

It's so amazing how everything is linked in some way. You experience something while traipsing along your daily path and the next thing you know, the same thing pops up again somewhere completely different. It's as if the universe knows you weren't paying attention and sent the message to you again.

Today I have received two such messages. First: I drew the 'Death' card this morning. Second: in a subsequent online draw, I drew the 'Ten of Swords'.

I know what you're thinking: 'It's very pretty Bishop, but what are we looking for?'. The point is this: those two cards have almost the same meaning.

Death: 

Death is symbolic of the ending of a major phase or aspect of your life that may bring about the beginning of something far more valuable and important. You must close one door in order to open another. You need to put the past behind you and part ways, ready to embrace new opportunities and possibilities. It may be difficult to let go of the past at times but you will soon see how important it is so that you can bring renewal and transformation into your life. If you resist these necessary endings, you may experience pain, both emotionally and physically but if you exercise your creative imagination and visualize a new possibility, you allow more constructive patterns to emerge.

Ten of Swords: 

The Ten of Swords is about letting go and accepting your current circumstances. You no longer resist change but allow it to happen, even if it causes some initial pain and hurt to you. You accept that there must be change in order to facilitate renewal, and you allow it to occur rather than fighting it.

When this card appears after a painful situation, it is a signal to pick yourself up off the ground and to reflect upon what happened to you and why, and what you can learn from the experience. Hidden deep beneath the surface of the Ten of Swords is the ultimate power of the Swords suit – the ability to analyse the situation and your responses, and learn from yourself. True wisdom does not come from without but from within. The Ten of Swords is a sign that the pain and hurt you have endured has not gone without purpose. The positive power within you can be used to learn from your pain and draw wisdom from defeat.

Can you see the pattern? It took two cards, but I certainly do. 

25 Jul 2014

How Amazing

Every morning, I draw a card from my Tarot deck just to see what lies ahead. I do not allow myself to become defined by that simple reading, nor do I rage when when things don't happen as were foretold. It would be easy to lay the blame at another's feet, and I simply cannot do that.

Now and then though, I get a response that tells me I'm doing the right thing. I feel as though it's the Universe telling me that I'm on the right path and imparting to me a gentle nudge of encouragement to keep going. I've been struggling with something for the past few days, facing some demons from my past that I've needed to silence, and today I drew the Five of Chalices.

For those who don't Read, here is the basic meaning of that card:

"The Five of Chalices card suggests that my power today lies in a crossroads. I am not alone. I intend to let go of despair or nostalgia and I choose to make peace with loss or express mourning in order to move forward. I release the rut of regret and the fear of tomorrow to make way for forgiveness, pleasure, beauty, and hope. I am empowered by my conscience and my gift is forgiveness."

How timely is this card? I have been trying to let go of past hurts and betrayals and have been working through it one small step at a time. This card tells me that I am doing the right thing by going slowly and not rushing my healing or forgiveness; both will come.

While I know in my heart what I am doing is right, it makes me feel better knowing the Universe is in sync with me. I will keep on my path, walking my Truth, knowing that my heart is clear.

And it doesn't hurt that I am wearing my favorite Batman tshirt at work either. 




23 Jul 2014

Life = Learning Things

Every single day I am alive on this great big ball of space dust, I learn things. Some of those things are glorious and magical and other times they make me want to curl up into a ball and wait for it to be over.

I needed to make amends to someone that I knew I had not treated the way they should have been treated. I crafted a message full of apology in order to be able to close the door and continue on my personal journey. I was surprised to receive a response that was clearly intended to hurt me. I took some time to digest the words and to search for the meaning hidden in them. I realized that there is still so much anger, and most of it has been misdirected my way, and that this person still has a very long road ahead of them in terms of accepting responsibility for their actions.

I am deciding whether or not to respond; I am no longer angry despite the many hurtful betrayals I suffered at their hands. I understand that it isn't my place or responsibility to educate them with respect to the email response: rather, it is my place to continue on my own journey and wish them nothing but the best.

What's interesting here is that a couple of years ago I would have jumped all over this and stated my case very clearly, ad nauseam, as to why I was being targeted unfairly and would have presented very clear and concise proof to back it all up. Now I just shake my head and give thanks for the reminder that I am not in control of anybody except myself and do not need to take responsibility for anyone's actions except mine. It's a wonderfully freeing experience and I wish I could share it with them.

I take solace in the fact that I reached out and gave them an opportunity to say the things they felt they needed to say. I am happy that I am in a place where I can do that without fear of losing myself to the demons that constantly circle and wait for an opening. 

I love this life and my journey. 

9 Jul 2014

Maybe a Quick Nap Would Help

I am tired. Like, deep-down exhausted. My brain won't let me sleep though, and although I've cut out caffeine and other triggers, I am still having trouble falling asleep and staying there.

I considered napping, but then I remembered the Seinfeld episode where Kramer decides to sleep 20 minutes every 3 hours and decided against it. Here's why.

The phenomenon of sleeping in short cycles is known as polyphasic sleep. Although there have been claims that several great thinkers of the past have all practised this. I don't think I will though, after I read up on it a bit more. Apparently, there is a 'worry'.

"The worry with polyphasic sleep is whether or not it sufficiently refreshes us, something that sleeping for an extended period of time each night has been proven to do. When hunkered down for the whole night, humans go through different stages of sleep, which are broadly separated into two categories: Rapid Eye Movement (REM) and Non-Rapid Eye Movement (NREM). During REM, the body and brain remain active, resulting in dreams. In NREM sleep, the body can either sleep lightly, such as when you first start to fall asleep, or deeply – a phase where there is body movement but little brain activity. The body alternates between these phases throughout the night, and REM sleep is generally achieved about 90 minutes into sleep." - taken from here

That gives me pause. If you don't get enough sleep, you don't get enough rest, on a cellular level. Which means you can't function at a high level the next day.

Guess I will stick to my original plan of cutting out caffeine and maybe add in a shot or two of whiskey. You know, just to help out.

3 Jul 2014

Horoscope, Schmoroscope

Here's my horoscope for today:

"People may drive you absolutely nuts today -- so make sure that you're giving yourself the space to escape when you need it. Things may start to get a little weird later in the day, if that's possible."

I thought that was interesting so I scoured the 'net for more horoscopes just to see if they are all saying the same thing. I don't consider this to be a waste of time: I see it as an interesting experiment.

Let's get started, shall we?

From The Globe and Mail:

"Break a few rules and put a few noses out of joint today. The planets are urging you to do something out of the ordinary, something that stirs things up a bit in your quiet little corner of the world. Rock the boat and see who falls out!"

Hmm. That sounds EXACTLY THE OPPOSITE. Almost like someone is just reaching into a bag of sentences and putting them together.

Now I am curious.

The Vancouver Sun says the same thing as the first one, which came from Astrology.com and I see why: The Vancouver Sun's horoscopes are taken from Astrology.com. No imagination there.

Elle magazine has this to say about my day:

"Whose side are you on anyway, Sagittarius? Remaining 'Switzerland' on matters is not a winning strategy for you today. Show your allegiance to the people who have been there for you through thick and thin. While you can privately disagree with them, in the public, it's essential that you show a unified front. Your willingness to take a stand on matters might not make you the most popular person out there, but it WILL earn you everyone's respect." 

Now I am confused. Am I supposed to give myself space, break a few rules, or take a stand? Maybe I am supposed to combine all of these to make a 'real' horoscope, like this:

"People may drive you absolutely nuts today -- so make sure that you're giving yourself the space to escape when you need it. Break a few rules and put a few noses out of joint today; your willingness to take a stand on matters might not make you the most popular person out there, but it WILL earn you everyone's respect."

#nailedit




1 Jul 2014

Wolves and Sheep

You know those people who pretend to love and support you while secretly doing their best to make sure you don't succeed? Of course you do. They are probably around you all of the time and are usually easy to spot once you know what to look for.

These people will automatically tell you how great you were, or how clever your idea is, but won't offer to help map it out or provide a source of positive feedback. They will sit there, inwardly rolling their eyes and when you ask them what they think they will say,"Sounds awesome!".

*not to be confused with those who genuinely think every single idea you have is brilliant. Those people are amazing, and you should hang onto them.

They are right there when it's time to talk about why it won't work, or how it could be better, but somehow their feedback seems sharp and painful rather than loving and helpful. They say that they are being open and honest, but you know better: it feels like they are using this an opportunity to get their digs in. None of that is helpful and it leads to miscommunications and fighting which sometimes ends up in a dissolved friendship.

I have had to try and figure out who these people are in my life and found that the answer is not always as clear or as logical as I wish it would be. People have 'off days' where nothing seems to go right and everyone is out to get them due to the giant target they feel spray-painted on their back. In times like this, it helps to step back and let them do their thing.

Time will tell whether or not the person is having an 'off day' or is really and truly a terrible person you should stay away from. Mistakes will be made. Feelings will be hurt. Apologies will be made and sometimes not accepted, that's okay too. 

If you aren't brave enough to stand up for yourself, try and imagine the situation happening to someone close to you. How would you feel? What would you do?

Then do that. For yourself.

28 Jun 2014

"The Wolverine" is a Pretty Good Movie

I won't spoil it for those who haven't seen it, But I will say that 'The Wolverine' is much better than I originally expected it to be. Lots of action, tons of swordplay, and the appearance of a couple Marvel characters that wouldn't really work in any of the other properties.

I watched it on Netflix, which for once actually streamed properly and didn't hiccup once as the movie unfolded. They even kept in the characteristic 'wait until after the credits roll' snippet that I realized, after seeing the most recent 'X-Men' movie, ties in perfectly with the flow of the franchise.

Well played, Marvel Studios. Well played.

And the bonus of course is that Netflix didn't interrupt the movie once, which I was incredibly grateful for since Jackman was shirtless throughout most of the movie.

Although, having the movie pause during one of those scenes might not incite the rage that I would normally have.

Perhaps.



26 Jun 2014

A Few Words Concerning 'Fault' and 'Blame'

There's a line in one of my favourite books that explains the origin of blame:

"Fault always lies with in the same place, my fine babies; with him weak enough to lay blame."

Let's discuss that.

I had a moment yesterday where I failed to recognize my own weakness. I wanted to attend a gathering and discovered that on the list of confirmed guests was someone I didn't care to see. In that moment, I had a choice: I could go and not engage that person, or I could not go and pout about it. I chose to not go and placed the blame squarely on this other person's shoulders. 

I felt they were directly responsible for me not going: I didn't want to see them or be in the same space as they were. Clearly not my fault, how-dare-they, and all that. 

Do you see the error?

By allowing someone to influence your decision to do things, you are in fact handing over control of yourself to that person. Sure, it would be uncomfortable to go and possibly run into someone I don't care to associate with, but far worse is the fact that I let them dictate what I would and wouldn't do with my time.

Yesterday, I showed that I was that weak person who laid blame. Today, I choose to not make that decision and to face whatever discomfort that choice might bring. 

I don't like sharing, so why give away something so precious as my own personal power?  

25 Jun 2014

Hate is so 90s

I am not sure when the word 'hate' became a substitute for 'don't really care for' but I have to say I am not liking it. Same goes for people who pepper their conversations with expletives like 'fuck' for shock value. You know what would really shock me? Someone who could argue without using expletives or any of their derivatives. That's talent.

I am guilty of it as well. I use words like 'shit' because it's a generally known word and there is no need for an explanation. Depending on the situation though, you might choose a different word to describe the situation you are currently facing. Trying to use alternatives is challenging but I think it's a good exercise. Using more words less often seems to be the way to get the brain to think outside the lines that it normally operates on.

I just reread that last sentence and feel the need to explain it.

What I mean is that there are more words out there than we as a society know what to do with. Most of us rarely go outside of our comfy linguistic bubble to try and use other types of words that would mean the same as the ones we are used to. We collect words to form our own style; sort of a language wardrobe, if you will. As we change, our choice of words do as well although perhaps not as quickly as hairstyles and clothing trends.

What if we tried to use more words that aren't normally part of our roster? We wouldn't have to use them every day and in time we could build up quite the quiver of words to use that aren't like every one else's. That sounds like a challenge, one that I am game to accept.

Kind of like a linguistic hipster, without the trappings.






24 Jun 2014

Baby Steps are Good for the Soul

I seem to spend a lot of time talking about doing things rather than just doing them. Part of that is because I suffer from a lack of confidence and I don't want to be laughed at if it should turn out that I fail. I share this trait with many other people and I am getting tired of it.

I read this article by Seth Godin that talks about compromise. One line in particular stuck out at me and made me sit back:

"Compromise gives us an out, because, with multiple goals, it's easy to play it safe."

Compromise does more than give me an out; it hobbles me to a point where every damn thing is so daunting I cannot even get started. A self-imposed daily goal of writing a thousand words does not sound too difficult when you consider how many hours in day there are in which to accomplish that. So what happens? Why can't I do it? Why can't I finish NaNoWriMo, even once?

Simple. I compromise my time away and I don't make it a priority. Also, I don't care who you are: a thousand words all in a row every single is pretty daunting. 

My solution is this: I am going to write 100 words a day on this blog. Sometimes it's going to be hard and I won't want to, and those are the times when I will really have to examine the choices I make. 

After all, when I say that I don't have time, what I'm really saying is I don't want to make it a priority. 

19 Jun 2014

On Keeping Secrets

I've been known to have a few secrets up my sleeve from time to time and I am normally very good at keeping them to myself. A secret shared ceases to be secret, after all.

So why am I taunting you?

Simple. I need to tell people that I have a secret and not say what it is. Kind of asshole-ish of me, I agree, but it has to happen.

Is it a good secret?

Perhaps.

Oh. Is it more of a bad secret?

Some of it.

Hmm.  

Look, forget I said anything.

*wink

18 Mar 2014

Everything is Wonderful

You know those days when you wake up feel invincible? For me, those days usually end in tears when I realize that I am not invincible and that someone has figured out a new way of hurting me. Thankfully, today was not like that.

I recently left my job and while it was terrifying to do, it has made me rethink my worth. My job was fulfilling in so many ways and I felt as though I was contributing to the overall success by doing my job. Toward the end though, I felt as though I wasn't wanted and that really confused me. I couldn't figure out what had changed; I only knew that I felt very uncomfortable.

I am not comfortable with providing details and I don't think it would really matter. I left, I am better off for having done so, and I am looking forward to new challenges in whatever form they might take.

I have successfully submitted my first draft of the comic I am working on and am now in the process of refining the character designs. I am really excited about this as I have not been able to do anything creative for quite some time. I am working on my website and trying to contribute to the geek sites that I have previously provided content for.

I recently went blonde again and am loving it this time around. I am feeling very positive about the future and looking forward to forging new paths.

I am also really enjoying sleeping in and working into the night on my own projects.

Mostly sleeping though. #truth

18 Feb 2014

Ready for Change

I need to do laundry. Seriously, it's becoming sentient. I walk in to my bedroom and I am startled by the size of the pile. It's spooking me now; it's casting great shadows on the wall when I turn the covers down for sleep. I wake up in the middle of the night and see it sitting there taunting me, this huge mountain of unwashed fabric.

Laundry needs to be done on a regular basis. It needs to be sorted and washed according to the instructions on the label. Failure to do so might lead to clothes shrinking, or delicates tearing, or socks not properly washed. You have to be gentle, yet firm; jeans can handle a bit of rough-and-tumble but stocking most certainly cannot. And I always read the labels. If there is any doubt, I always hang garments to dry. 

Wait -- am I using laundry as a metaphor? Am I crafty enough to do such a thing?  

21 Jan 2014

Holy Crap You Guys

I did a bit of an experiment today and wanted to share it with you. I read an article that dealt with how people view you depending on which side you part your hair. Sounds crazy, right? Turns out, it isn't crazy and it actually works. Here's what I did.

I normally part my hair on the right. Been doing it ever since I can remember. While getting ready to go out last night, I decided to try out the theory that women who part their hair on the left are seen as more powerful than those who choose right-sided parts. I styled my hair so that the part was on the left side and left for the evening.

I didn't notice anything at all. Maybe it was because I was out with friends, but nothing was different. And then today, I went to work. Whole different ball game.    

I've been having some difficulty communicating with my boss for the past couple of months and when she came in today, she looked me in the eye rather than let her gaze slide over me like she normally does. Straight away I was intrigued. Thinking it was a one-off and wouldn't stick, I went into her office to ask a question. She stopped what she was doing, and looked at me while I spoke.

Weird. Very weird. Probably has nothing to do with my hair but thought I'd write about it anyhow. Doesn't hurt to log these things.

On a totally separate note, I have a few big things in the works that I will talk about once I get my ass in gear. Really great things and I'm very excited about how all this is starting to play out.

2014 is already shaping up to be a great year.

15 Jan 2014

I don't Have a Title For This Post

You read that right. I actually do not have a title for this post, because trying to come up with one would stop me from writing. I have successfully deflected the urge to put writing aside until I found a suitable title. Now, what do I win?

First of all, I have finally succeeded in getting a post up for the website I write for. If you are interested, you can read it here. This is the second article I have written for them and the first one they've posted: the first post I did for them resulted in me needing to step away and calm down.

It's a matter of differing opinions and in this case, I did what I thought was the right thing: I removed the article and put it on my personal website. No mess, no fuss, but it did leave a bit of a bad taste in my mouth for a variety of reasons.

My article dealt with specific examples taken from my experiences regarding gaming with guys. I wrote it because I felt guys were getting the short end of the stick when it comes to role-playing. Apparently, my article made all the girl gamers feel like I was telling them they weren't really gaming unless they gamed with guys, which was just downright ridiculous. If your self-esteem is directly tied to other people's experiences, then the real problem here isn't me, it's you.

Moving on: I've been contacted by another group to write for them as well. Haven't put anything together as yet but have a few ideas. We'll see how it goes!

I am also looking for new opportunities on the job front. I think I have done all I can in my current gig and it doesn't look like there will be much in the way of challenges for me. That being said, I am going to try and make some challenges: there is lots to do here and I might just need to step up a bit.

The real news is this: I'm looking for an agent. I am at that stage where I want to pursue my writing more aggressively and I think having an agent will increase my chances. I am almost halfway through writing my book and will be looking for an editor in the next couple months to get it in shape for submitting. So exciting!

That's it, that's all, there is no more. At least, not right now. It could all change in an instant.