You know those people who pretend to love and support you while secretly doing their best to make sure you don't succeed? Of course you do. They are probably around you all of the time and are usually easy to spot once you know what to look for.
These people will automatically tell you how great you were, or how clever your idea is, but won't offer to help map it out or provide a source of positive feedback. They will sit there, inwardly rolling their eyes and when you ask them what they think they will say,"Sounds awesome!".
*not to be confused with those who genuinely think every single idea you have is brilliant. Those people are amazing, and you should hang onto them.
They are right there when it's time to talk about why it won't work, or how it could be better, but somehow their feedback seems sharp and painful rather than loving and helpful. They say that they are being open and honest, but you know better: it feels like they are using this an opportunity to get their digs in. None of that is helpful and it leads to miscommunications and fighting which sometimes ends up in a dissolved friendship.
I have had to try and figure out who these people are in my life and found that the answer is not always as clear or as logical as I wish it would be. People have 'off days' where nothing seems to go right and everyone is out to get them due to the giant target they feel spray-painted on their back. In times like this, it helps to step back and let them do their thing.
Time will tell whether or not the person is having an 'off day' or is really and truly a terrible person you should stay away from. Mistakes will be made. Feelings will be hurt. Apologies will be made and sometimes not accepted, that's okay too.
If you aren't brave enough to stand up for yourself, try and imagine the situation happening to someone close to you. How would you feel? What would you do?
Then do that. For yourself.
