Social Manners in Small Spaces

I have been living in the same place for a number of years and while I love it, I need a change. I have always regretted moving from the amazing apartment I had just prior to moving into my current place, and now I have an opportunity to move back.

Let me back up a bit. When I split from my ex-husband, I stayed with a friend in her apartment for about 6 weeks while I got my shit together. As I went about my daily routine, I noticed how relaxed I was, considering the situation I was in. I snagged an apartment in the same building and moved out of my friend's place and set about rebuilding my life.

During the next couple of years, a number of things happened that contributed to me deciding to move to my current place. While my time in my current place has been good, there are a few things that have happened recently that have made me want to move.

I understand that not everyone works on the same schedule and I try my best to be considerate of those who live around me. Living in a corner suite on the top floor with only one neighbor attached has enabled me to live relatively noise-free for the past couple of years. While there are some noisy people every now and again, for the most part people are adults and don't play their music at ear-bleeding levels at all hours of the day. Those that plan to alert their neighbors ahead of time by going to their doors and telling them and not just placing a post-it on their door and calling it 'asking for feedback'.

Look, I know you feel that it's your right to play your drums or piano as loud as you want during the day and on the weekends. I get that it's something you feel passionately about and I understand the creative process and how it might seem like a good idea to compose music at 2:30 am. The reality of it is, you live in a giant sound-conducting structure where everyone can hear you and no one likes it. Sticking a post-it note on your door or putting a sign up in the lobby telling people that you need to do this and asking for 'feedback' is both immature and delusional. 

There is no place where this type of behaviour is acceptable. If you work in an office, you cannot play music loudly at your desk nor can you engage in intense conversations that disturb others. Same for school, the library, public transit, and just about everywhere. It astonishes me how people can walk into their homes and immediately feel as though they are immune from all social responsibility simply because they are in their own space.

Don't misunderstand me, I've had my share of knocks at the door and polite 'can you turn down your videogames/music/movies/stop yelling "Yahtzee!" because you aren't even playing that game, please' conversations with neighbors. Here's the thing though: I didn't need to be told multiple times or force my neighbors to call the cops because I refused to answer the door or turn my shit down. It's consideration and once you lose that, you've lost what it means to be able to coexist with others.

And that's why I am moving back to the building that I never should have left. 

Some people have said that it seems as though I am moving backwards but I disagree. It's the same building yes, but it's a new apartment on a different floor with more room. It's a great opportunity to finally have the home office that we so desperately need.

So moving backwards? Nope. Moving forwards? Yes. A thousand times yes. And I cannot wait to get there and sit on the balcony and sip my coffee and be at peace.